Saturday, November 14, 2009

Of Courag3 and Lov3

This incident happened when I’m still in primary school. I’m always curious as a kid and love observing the behaviors of insects or animals. Guess this explains why I took up psychology, maybe I was bored of the simplicity of insects and animals, thus decided to observe human instead (how lame rite…). Anyway back to the story…

My previous house used to have a large garden since my mum love gardening. One good thing about having a garden is you’re able to observe insects from near. One fine day, the cute little curious boy in me that was still studying in primary school went to the garden and hoping to catch some spiders or insects as victims pets. When I was near a papaya tree, something attracted my attention. I saw a butterfly attacking a spider (the butterfly was slightly larger in size) and gotten excited by this scene, I continued my observation due to the fact that no logic in this world would explain why a butterfly would want to attack a spider.

The butterfly was trying to ram itself into the spider, as if trying to prevent the spider from climbing further up the tree. The spider somehow retreated slightly, as if it was staring at specific direction and the butterfly moved back to land on a higher part of the tree. Moments later, the spider tried to proceed up the tree and the butterfly began its assault on the spider without hesitation. I start to feel curious due to the fact that the movement of both the spider and butterfly suggested that the spider is trying to reach a certain spot of the tree and the butterfly is trying to prevent that from happening. I did noticed that the spider tried to attack the butterfly but to no avail due to some smart maneuver from the butterfly that uses its wings to repel any potential attack. There was once where the spider took a slight bite on the butterfly but the butterfly managed to fend it off fast. After around 5-10 minutes of fighting, I noticed the butterfly started to get fatigue (I believed the initial bite’s poison start to take its toll on the butterfly’s body).

Being the righteous kid as I always had, I shooed the spider far and away. Stepping backwards as an assurance to the butterfly that everything is fine, I noticed it flew up slightly to the leaf area and landed there. I took a peep and I saw the butterfly and its mate (sorry, can’t differentiate their gender), which appeared rather weak and seemed to be dying pretty soon. This explains why the butterfly had all those courage to crazily attack a spider earlier; it was to protect its mate despite the fact that its mate is clearly dying soon, even though that butterfly faces the danger of getting killed. The butterfly did all those just to buy its mate some extra precious moments of life, and I could not help but to admire the courage and love of that butterfly in taking concern for its mate.

Now I knew why and what it was fighting for. Its courage in attacking a natural predator for its mate’s life had earned itself some extra precious last few moments with its mate. I left the scene soon, still feeling amazed at what I saw.
Since then, I’ve always tried to remember the courage of that butterfly whenever I see huge obstacles facing me. I use that butterfly’s courage as an inspiration and to remind myself that good things are worth fighting for.

End of story---------

Courage is the mental muscle that conquers fear. Like all muscles, the more you use them the stronger they become. Courage is not something you are born with, it must be developed. Individuals that fail to develop courage will always remain confined in their own mental prisons and face each day as mental lightweights.

A little courage leads to more. Observe those poor souls who are without courage. They merely tiptoe through life hoping they make it safely to death. I believed that we were never meant to live that way. Learn to live the way you like by no longer living as you dislike. Forge into the remainder of your day with an abundance of courage. That is what I call, true living.

The below video is a big inspiration that I felt worth watching.



How they saw things.
The vision they had.
And what they were going to do to get there.
Just like you and I.
We all can choose to live beyond the average if we dare.

p/s: This post is dedicated to a good friend that is celebrating her 22nd years old birthday today. It is my hope that she's able to do a breakthrough in her current life and garnered enough courage to seek what she wants. All the best in life and happy 22nd birthday ;)

Sunday, November 1, 2009

The real satisfaction

Dedicating this post to Arnie since i promised her to write something here today hehe.

I've adopted the habit of observing and trying to analyze people (not girl's boob or arse, mind u) in terms of their behavior ever since taking up psychology. Sounds creepy rite? But hey, I lub doing that :P

One important thing I noticed was how people define satisfaction in their life that contributes to their own self-esteem. I've come across people that were rich, or people that were extremely pretty but yet they wasn't satisfied with their life. In fact, these people assumed they had achieved little or nothing in life and thus feeling down and suffered from low self-esteem.

Don't believe it? Lemme ask you this and answer to these questions frankly based on what you know about yourself, or even those people that you know that you might know or come across:

a) You're a pretty girl by public eyes and have lots of admirers. People have been praising your beauty very much, and you do feel happy with those praises. Yet, you've been suffering from low self-esteem and assumed that you didn't really achieve much in life.

b) You're quite a public figure (those in entertainment or political field), where your fans spurns from hundreds to thousands. People acknowledge your achievement, people praises you immensely and you can afford to buy goods or gifts that you like, yet you feel those admiration doesn't reflect or mean anything to you. You just feel you didn't achieve much in life.

c) You're the showstopper and always one of the main attraction in the crowd wherever you go. People glued to you because you made them cheer and laugh their arse out, you create fun and great atmosphere and always able to light up even the most dull occasion. You're well-known because of this and people just love being by your side. Despite these public acceptance, you never quite feel satisfied and feel down whenever you're by yourself. You feel you didn't achieve much in life.

d) You're what I call, the reincarnation of an angel. You're known to be the perfect man or woman when it comes to friendship. You're known amongst your friend as the most gentlemen (or gentlelady), humble, down-to-earth, and the extremely helpful lad that never reject helping people in need, thus winning you a group of small but great friends. Despite having this great bunch of people around you whenever you need them or otherwise, yet you feel you didn't achieve much in life.

The above 4 scenarios above are just some example of people I've come across that felt themselves as, "just another person that didn't achieve much in life" despite them possessing beauty, and/or material goods, and/or social recognition. The question why is easily answered, and it was due to the fact that they are not able to link their success to their inner soul.

What do i mean by this you might ask. Lemme give an example. When you come across a great song or movie that you've heard or seen, you can really feel this song or movie have some kind of emotional link to your inner soul. You can feel the link is so great till the extent you can feel the emotion that the singer and/or songwriter is trying to portray out to its listener. And yes, these kind of songs can last for centuries and yet the listener will never feel dull listening to it. Reason? Because you had managed to link that song to your inner soul, thus able to appreciate whatever it was being sang to you, and such appreciation DO last for years if not forever.

Another example was, you might be yearning to get the latest model of laptop or handphone. Let's say you finally got it, and for sure you will feel happy for a week or so. Afterward, that laptop or handphone is just another "one of your many items" that you owned, and do you feel proud and happy after buying it? Yes, you do, but only for like a week or so as I've pointed out but definitely not for long. This is why people that gained satisfaction via material goods are never satisfied, and this could be attributed to newer models are always out in the market or most of them never been able to link these material collections to their inner soul. One exception though are those hardcore collectors of a particular item, e.g. Gundam series models.

What I wanted to point out was most people failed to relate their achievement to their inner soul, and thus they never felt their achievement is something to be proud of. Jealousy can be one of the reason, but the main reason could be deep inside you have this betrayer that keep belittle your own achievement. And sad to say, nobody actually betrays yourself more than you because you will never feel sad if you don't allow yourself to do so.

Gaining the real satisfaction is how you balance yourself and get rid of the betrayer in you while trying to link your success to yourself. Such balance is important in order not to get overly carried away by your achievement and to always stay humble in order to gain more success.

Hope this post helps ^_^

Thursday, October 29, 2009

Underweight ISN'T more attractive!

Been quite sometime since i last updated this blog, i guess my course mates understand why haha. No, busy is definitely not an excuse, it's just me being lazy. Satisfied? :P

Anyway, I've come across this interesting report and thought of sharing it out, so nice of me rite? Another thing is copy n paste while giving credits to the original source allows this lazy blog owner to laze off ma hehe. Hope you find the report as useful as I do :)

Young men find "normal" sized women more attractive than size zero celebrities, research has suggested.

Male students at St Andrews University were asked to rate female faces for attractiveness and health.

The study found that girls with an average weight and build were ranked as being the most attractive and healthy.

Researchers said the findings sent out a strong message to young women who believe being underweight is considered to be attractive.

The research was carried out by a team from the university's Perception Lab, who asked 84 female students a variety of questions on their health, took their blood pressure and photographed them.

The photographs were then shown to a group of male students who were asked to rate them for health, attractiveness and weight.

Professor David Perrett, who supervised the project, said: "In our study, people in the normal weight range were judged healthier and more attractive than under or overweight individuals.

"This sends a strong message to all the girls out there who believe you have to be underweight to be attractive.

"The people making judgments in our study were all between the ages of 18 and 26 and they did not rate underweight girls most attractive. They preferred normal weight girls."

Lead researcher Vinet Coetzee said although people often often remark on how healthy or unhealthy someone looks, it can be very difficult to say precisely how we know this.

'Already suffering'

She added: "Scientists have been trying to answer this question for decades, and have made many breakthroughs in our understanding of health and attractiveness, but until now they have tended to overlook the influence of weight."

Ms Coetzee said students who were rated as being overweight reported more frequent and longer-lasting cold and flu bouts, used antibiotics more frequently and had higher blood pressure than the students who were considered normal weight.

"Even at this young age, their health was already suffering because they were overweight, and what is more, other people can spot this in their face," she added.

The findings have been published online by the scientific journal Perception.

Source

Hope this finding will change the mindset of those of you who are already on normal weight but still insists to reduce more. Adios~

Wednesday, October 7, 2009

Be more positive!

Human always cry and whine during the darkest hour in their life. Yet they had forgotten that stars can only be seen when the sky is dark or rainbow can only be sighted after a rainy day.

Monday, September 28, 2009

Beefkuteh aka Beef's Bakuteh



I came to this shop 1 year ago and immediately fall in love with it (I mean the food!!!). After much pestering (plus my lack of going back to Melaka), my "ahmad" finally brought me once again during our recent Raya Holiday.


*Place is full when we arrived*

We reached this place around 7.30pm and the whole place is full! There were at least 2 other groups ahead of us in the queue so ya, me and my friend were waiting patiently (not to mention hungrily) for over 30 minutes before we get a seat. Trust me, it sux to see people enjoying their yummy beef slices for over 30 minutes while you were standing near the roadside with your tummy protesting like crazy.


*Uncle busy preparing foods for loads of gluttons including both of us*

Me and my friend ordered 2 cans of 100plus a pot of beefkuteh for 2 while adding extra beef balls and fried foo chuk. Trust me, you really need to be patient to eat here cos it may take like 15-30 minutes before our food were served onto our table.


*Aww, finally the food, the delicious, the yummeh*

Finally our beefkuteh arrived, its a well portioned pot of beef slices, beef balls, foo chuk and cabbages served with 2bowls of rice. The soup isn't the typical bakuteh soup you eat, it have a strong scent of black pepper but the taste is just nice. Best part was the beef slices were not overly cooked. You can taste the tenderness of the meat that comes with little fat that blended nicely with the soup.

Total cost was RM36, but trust me, this pot of beefkuteh can easily feed up to 4-5 people. You must really try this especially during rainy season.

Info:
Place's Name: Loi's Bakuteh and Beef Stall
Address: 6022C, Jalan Penghulu Abbas, Bukit Baru, Melaka
Business Hour: 6.00pm till 10.30pm
GPS Location: N2 13.742 E102 16.624

Sunday, September 20, 2009

Black or White?

A deep sigh of breath was heard... Ace had been wandering on the street without any purpose for the past 1 day, still thinking of the sudden change of life he had faced.

*1 month ago*
Ace had always been an excellent cop. Known for his strong standing and great sense of justice principles, he never gives up on any cases. Today was yet another day he had solve another big case, adding another extra achievement to his already reputable career as a police officer. He has been holding to those principles all these while, believing that justice will always prevail and all trials will be handled in a fair and square manner. He's currently hard-tracking a team of professional robbers called Skyliners.

*8 days ago*
Ace had been suspended from his job indefinately. He was suspected to be involved in a series of robbery involving Skyliners. His gun was found in one of the crime scene and CCTV caught his images in another robbery. Yet Ace argued it was a setup to discontinued his efforts in investigating Skyliners.

*2 days ago*
Internal investigation within police had decided to charge Ace as a collaborative partner of Skyliners. Ace, crying foul over this setup disbelief that his innocence was ignored especially after his years of commitment towards the police force. He felt his belief in justice was greatly shattered and he can no longer trust the principles that he uphold all these while.

*1 day ago*
Ace was being deported to a detention centre. Inside the police van, he saw a driver and another cop guarding him. The cop, raising his cap showed a familiar face to Ace. It was Andy, his ex-partner and most trusted comrade in the police force for the past 5 years. Both had saved each other's life on numerous occassion before Andy disappeared 6 months ago. Andy said he was working for a powerful political figure now due to his disappointment with corruption within the police force and juridical system in the country. Ace disbelieved this fact, but Andy cited Ace's case as an example of corruption within higher police ranks to shut Ace's investigation on Skyliners.

Andy offered Ace a solution, to work for the political figure and his boss will use his political influence to cover up Ace's case and restore his status as a police officer. Ace argued that Andy's boss had a record of illegal tradings and links with triads, and working with this political figure means breaking all the faith and principle Ace had been holding all these while. Andy slapped Ace and told him how his so-called principles had landed him into troubles that he faced today. Andy then helped Ace escape from the police van and asked him to think properly before letting Andy know his own decision.

*Current time*
Ace had a short sigh and showed a confuse face on whether to stick to his principles or belief which is to surrender himself to the police station or to take up the offer from the devil which totally defies his usual beliefs.

Tada, the End!!

I guess there are many times in life where we might faced the above scenario, where whether we should sacrifice what we believed in or to hold onto it regardless of situation. Decisions like these are definately not easy to make, especially when an incident really shatters what you've been holding onto all these while.

Such incident happened to me recently, but I guessed I've learned from it where there are times we need to change and adept our beliefs according to situation.

How about u?

Thursday, September 3, 2009

Final Semester!

Just did some minor revamp due to my laziness... Wanted to do a purely html coding revamp but guessed i'm just too lazy or its due to my new semester had just begun 2 days ago (such a good reason rite?). Previous semester's grade is ok, not great mainly caused i targeted slightly higher. Grade for thesis 1 isn't out, hopefully it will be released somewhere next week according to some admin staff.

Wishing everyone to have a nice semester ahead and good luck to all. ;)

Monday, July 27, 2009

Time to Revamp!!

I guess I will start blogging again after all these lazy time. But before that, i will try to revamp the outlook of my blog first haha, the page design is kinda ugly *puts the blame on blogspot for not having cool functions like wretch did which causes me to feel lazy updating this blog =x.

Check it out later, and hasta la vista.

Thursday, May 7, 2009

Tagged...

by Lee Susu, i mean Cheryl Lee

Here's the direction:
Once you've been tagged, you have to write a post with sixteen random things, habits or goals about you. At last, choose five people to be tagged, listing their names and why you chose them.

1. I always love adventures, which explains why I like to travel around and experience new stuffs (didnt have the chance to travel that much though :().

2. Its a rare case for guys, but hey, orange is my favorite color ;)

3. Loves spending time on my own. I always like to go to mall or movies alone.

4. Always have a rumoured gf ever since i started studying in HELP. But i do fall for one, only ONE so far. As for the rest, its only what you think :(

5. I love gaming... Its in me and part of me. Almost 70% of what I know, English included were learnt from various games.

6. I'm super lucky with gambling. 2 wins out of 4 bets in Magnum/Toto, winning money every CNY cept one year and claiming a 4:1 win ratio over Uncle Lim hehe. Either lady luck must've really love me or I've done multiple good deeds in the past *shiok sendiri*

7. Is definately one of the laziest person u've ever known. Those that knows me well understand this lol.

8. Loves materials that requires myself to use deeper level of cognitive processing. <3 Kindaichi comics...

9. Is definately one hell of a cocky bastard if u dunno me at first. Cos i won't take the initiative to say hi to u, or maybe just give u a cold response even if u say hi first.

10. Most of my closer friends are females. *wink wink*

11. Loves Foodsssssssssss (see how many Ss i put? that shows how much i love foods :().....

12. A big fan of Arsenal football club.

13. Admires people who is capable of looking things at many different perspectives (in an intelligent manner of cos).

14. The kind of people you will call Jack of all Trade, master of none cos I don't specialize in things that I know *except for gaming!*.

15. I have deep curiousity and tend to find out the reason behind *something*.

16. Always uses my intuition and deduction reasoning when making decisions. Not so much of a stats or detailed person.


Phew, finally... now lets see who i wanna choose to be the next 5 victims ngiak ngiak ngiak...

Catherine: didn't really see u write much about urself.

Hui Ling: ppl often misunderstand u at first, so its a good chance to clear their doubts? :P

Jan-E: Just wish to hear from this old friend ;)

Ling Chih: been quite awhile since last heard from you. take this as a chance to update me about urself lol.

Mei Sim: dont think i ever see u blogged in English before. give you the chance to do it now so fast fast thank me k? :P

ReBlogging?

It’s been quite awhile since I last updated this baby. Guess I was too busy, lazy or even forgotten that I’ve this blog? Heh, it doesn’t matter anyway. Was very glad that my 1st semester in year 3 is finally over. 6 subjects together with your other life thingy is indeed no joke and guess I gotta pray to god that I’m still in one piece hehe. But college is reopening soon, too soon cos time passes by so fast… if anyone knows a timekeeper, pls let him/her know that he/she will have a loyal customer in me… want to buy time!!!

Lots of freaking things take place in the past few months, but I guess those events were necessary to help me to grow? Maybe yes, maybe no, only time will tell. But a new semester is beginning soon, a rather busy one again cos I will be taking 4 subjects since some were only offered this semester. All the best to everyone, see you guys soon ;)

Wednesday, March 4, 2009

Story of the sea...

This story begins long before man develop airplanes. Anna and Eva are the best of friends. Both of them have the same dream, to become the world's first explorer to go around the world in a ship. Upon reaching 30, both of them set sailed (don't ask me where they get the ship and skill, that's not the main purpose of the story) together with their ship, Happy Ever, hoping to achieve their childhood dream together.

And so 5 years have passed. They have brave countless waves, whirpool and sea storms, and travelled to various countries and continents and meeting up with countless people in the process. They're very near in achieving their goals, and after all these years, had finally arrived in a country called Poland, best known for having the best shipwrights (in case you dunno, its carpenter that repairs or build ships) in the world. Happy Ever is quite worn out after all these years as there was no major repair being done on the ship all these while, and thus Anna and Eva thought it would be a good idea to find some shipwrights to do a throughly inspection on their ship's condition.

After a careful evaluation, they were told that Happy Ever can no longer be repaired, as its keel (the main structure at the bottom of every ship) is spoilt, thus making any repair deemed meaningless. Anna and Eva feels very reluctant since they have developed a very strong bond with Happy Ever after all these years of travelling together, persuaded the shipwright to try his best to repair the ship since both explorers had nearly completed their goal and would like to accomplish it together with Happy Ever.

The shipwright explained that despite the ship seems fine on the outside, yet the wear and tear on the main structure unseen to them is already beyond repair. He even advised both explorers to get a new ship for safety purposes.

Anna and Eva sat down at a nearby tavern to discuss the situation, and Anna favoring getting a new ship while Eva persists to continuing travelling with Happy Ever. Eva said that, even though Happy Ever is just a ship, yet they have travelled together and encountered various situation all these while and they shouldn't abandon the ship when they nearly reached their goal. Both friends ended up arguing and trying to send each other's message across, but it only ended up in greater arguement.

Both friends departed their way, with Anna getting a new ship while Eva is asking her crewman to repair Happy Ever. 2 weeks later, both friends travelled separately for the first time, and Anna reached her final destination 6 months later. She tried to seek information about Eva but didn't find any, and 1 month later she saw in newspaper that Happy Ever had been swept over by a strong tidal wave while the fate of all crews were unknown.

I guess I'm more of the Eva character all these while, not able to let go things that I treasured in the past, and thus didn't really end up "that well" in some sense (don't ask me, i dunno haha). Guess it's time to take up the Anna character for now.

Friday, February 6, 2009

Current Life and Memories...

Life had been a hectic one for me in the past 1 month. Works seemed to be endless, they keep pilling up more and more and I guess I kinda lost my life; many nights without good rest, many hours facing the comp, and there's only work and more work in my brain. Sigh... I guess such life won't stop till the end of this semester since assignments are pilling up for now, not to mention mid-terms are coming.

I didn't feel pressured all these while, but I believed subconsciously I do feel the pressure cos there are times where my mind only think about my work. So much so that sometimes i wake up on my own even when i just had 3-4 hours of sleep. Lack of rest can make a grumpy person, plus the fact that there was one recent event that really gives me a big impact... my ex's dad had just passed away last month when she just recovered from her depression... Sigh...

Whenever I think back of her history of depression, I do feel afraid maybe cos I'm a psychology student myself and I know pretty well how a depress person will think and act. And ya, I do blame myself heavily for being part of the cause of her depression every now and then, mainly because I wasn't there for her when she needs me, and worst still, I didn't even know she had depression till it got pretty serious! Such a lousy bf rite? I guess part of me can't really forgive myself for partially contributing such sickness to her especially now after knowing her dad's news... There is no way I can help her for now cos... I guess she would like to keep a distant between us which is understandable... Sigh, all i can do is to pray she will be fine, and trust her that she will be able to take good care of herself.

I hardly talk about my real feelings to people, dun ask me why. People always see me as a jovial person, and jovial is indeed my nature. Yet there are times when I do feel kinda demotivated due to the lousy ways I handled some of my things. I once told a friend how to let go, but I guess I'm heavily imprisoned by some of my past. Overly strong principles, stubbornness, and some stupid schemas were what the past had shaped me. As much as I tried to change, yet this 'Lucifer' in me will just pop out whenever I start to lose myself sometimes.

Last month I had a very silly heated arguement with my pet sis over some small matter, cos of this. This week again, I had a very big misunderstanding with a close friend of mine due to some of my stupid action due to my principles again. As much as I tried to control, it seemed that there are times where I will just revert back to my old-self without me knowing it consciously. It sux, really sux cos I guess I might have lost 2 very good friends in the period of one month.

I'm not sure if I can remedized the situation, nor I'm not sure if we will still be as close as in the past, but one thing for sure is I would really need to learn to let go my past and memories. Wish me all the best...

Monday, January 12, 2009

Four Letter Word... "SIGH"

I sigh cos how things are so unfair for you...

I sigh at the chain events that keep befalling into a person that don't deserve all such shits...

I sigh cos I can't do anything at all to help your current situation...

I sigh cos I was partly the reason you got your sickness in the past...

I sigh cos I didn't do enough for you in the past...

I sigh...

How cruel can life be? Why must a nice person like you kept experiencing shitty life events. Why? I really can't understand...

Is cruelty such an important essence in life? It could be true to some extend, but how cruel when bad things keep happened on someone that doesn't deserve it? Is this the way of the world? I really can't understand...

I wish there are things that I can do to help your situation, but I really dunno what I can do except sending you regards and asking those I knew to look after you. I wished I can do more, as a close friend, to share some of your burden. I heard you're strong, but please don't try too hard to be strong k?

I really wish to know your situation and hope things are better for you and your family. Lemme know if there is anything I can do for you...

Saturday, January 10, 2009

What Lies Ahead?

Another year had passed, and a new one had begun. This means that I'm another year older (duh). Meh, not as though I'm concerned about age, I guess that's something we guys can hoo haa and shout about (sorry girls).

Finally in my final year of my degree course, the weird thing is I'm still not exhausted after these few years of studying. Reason? Cos I hate to study since... sec school? But glad I still didn't lose the passion for psychology hehe, if not sure fail like crazy.

I would always like to do something memorable and extraordinary once in awhile, and guess this will be the year I'll try something new. To catch up with life while learning along the journey and those around me.

Happy New Year to everyone btw.